A different nurse again this day. Alex has been at the second hospital for nearly a week and is on his seventh nurse. This one scared me as she's younger than the ones we'd had and really quite loud; and a little in-your-face. But it turned out that this wasn't a bad thing as she encouraged me to take on a more hands-on role with Alex. She had me cleaning what was left of the umbilical cord, changing his diaper, warming his milk, and putting him into diaper shirts and sleepers before I took him out of the incubator, rather than just wrapping him in a blanket. She was also the first nurse to show me how to bathe him. He was so tiny in the giant tub that I had immediate anxiety about having to bathe him myself at some point, but I tried to just focus and watch the nurse as she carefully washed his face and hair, and then down his front, and then flipping him to his back before drying him off.
First thing this morning was difficult as I sat next to Alex in the incubator and watched as another mom and baby neared discharge. They were breastfeeding 5/8 feedings now, and the baby was taking the other 3 feedings by bottle, so his feeding tube was now out. I find these moments hard as it always seems that Alex is still so far away from reaching that point; but at the same time it's nice to see that one day he should get there as well.
I enjoy weekends at the hospital much more because of the quiet. The NICU has their regular visitors but less staff and less noise. There's always lots of room in the parking lot and when I take a break and wander down to the lobby, there are very few people in the halls. My husband also comes to the hospital with me on occasion since he's off work which is great company. It's not the same having my mom or a friend with me; they just don't seem to understand what it's like to be going through this experience, at least not like my husband.
I also noticed when I arrived home later in the day that I was excited to see my dog for the first time since this whole adventure began. I curled up with her on the couch; lay my head on her back, and stroked her fur gently. It was very comforting, and something that I realized I had been missing. I guess that's the thing about pets, their unconditional love and loyalty cannot be matched and it's something I should be taking advantage of.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Regurging (Spitting Up)
Apparently it's quite normal for preemies to spit up. I was told this has to do with an undeveloped flap that keeps food from rising out of the stomach. Like everything else with babies, some spit up more than others.
Alex seemed to have great difficulty with regurging from the start. His nurses tried many different things, from my holding him up for over an hour after a feed (probably worked the best- but he would still spit up after I put him down- and it wasn't manageable for me to be there for every feed); to keeping his head propped up on blankets; to keeping him on his tummy. It became routine quite quickly for me to hold him up when I was there, or to keep him on his tummy if I wasn't. A new nurse would come on and often try the normal way, him lying close to flat on his back, but that would usually only last once. I would tell them that it wouldn't work, but they would try anyway. And then he would spit up all over the place and they would quickly panic and try to clean it up, and say 'wow, he really does spit up'.
It was scary the few times I was sitting alone with Alex and he spit up so much that he would start choking. After the first time when I panicked and yelled for a nurse, I learned to quickly grab him and sit him upright, patting him lightly on the back. It was terrible to watch my little guy go through this every couple of hours; and it seemed that just when he would finally start to settle down, it was time for another feed.
Giving the tube feeds became quite the challenge as Alex did everything he could to push the milk and medications back up the tubes. It made some of the nurses quite unhappy as it meant they had to stay with him until he finished the feed so they could cap the tube before he brought it back up. I imagine it was easier when they could just hook the syringe to the top of the incubator, or later cot, quickly dump the milk down and come back a while later to unhook it and cap the tube. But between the regurging and pushing the milk back up, Alex could not be left alone during a feed.
Alex seemed to have great difficulty with regurging from the start. His nurses tried many different things, from my holding him up for over an hour after a feed (probably worked the best- but he would still spit up after I put him down- and it wasn't manageable for me to be there for every feed); to keeping his head propped up on blankets; to keeping him on his tummy. It became routine quite quickly for me to hold him up when I was there, or to keep him on his tummy if I wasn't. A new nurse would come on and often try the normal way, him lying close to flat on his back, but that would usually only last once. I would tell them that it wouldn't work, but they would try anyway. And then he would spit up all over the place and they would quickly panic and try to clean it up, and say 'wow, he really does spit up'.
It was scary the few times I was sitting alone with Alex and he spit up so much that he would start choking. After the first time when I panicked and yelled for a nurse, I learned to quickly grab him and sit him upright, patting him lightly on the back. It was terrible to watch my little guy go through this every couple of hours; and it seemed that just when he would finally start to settle down, it was time for another feed.
Giving the tube feeds became quite the challenge as Alex did everything he could to push the milk and medications back up the tubes. It made some of the nurses quite unhappy as it meant they had to stay with him until he finished the feed so they could cap the tube before he brought it back up. I imagine it was easier when they could just hook the syringe to the top of the incubator, or later cot, quickly dump the milk down and come back a while later to unhook it and cap the tube. But between the regurging and pushing the milk back up, Alex could not be left alone during a feed.
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